go ahead…you know you want to…
Eating when I am not hungry. That has been a huge issue for me over my lengthy professional career of being obese. How many times have I eaten for one of the following reasons? (none of which have the slightest thing to do with hunger)
1.) It’s there –The sheer fact that something is within grabbing distance is NOT a good reason to eat it. I don’t just pick up a spool of yarn and start sewing because it’s there? God knows I don’t just randomly start vacuuming cause the vacuum is sitting in the corner grinning at me.
2.) I am bored- Oh, this is a big one for me…I live in a thriving city(humor me) , with parks, art museums, shopping, professional sports teams, many concert venues, volunteer opportunities, libraries, opera, symphony, live theatre, bike trails, dog parks. Hot Fudge is not a recreational activity.
3.) Everyone else is eating (insert any high caloric, delicious food) –well everyone else does not have the metabolism of a three toed sloth. I have found that social eating is a pitfall for me, it’s hard to not file it under the excuse of “special occasion” and over eat. That is why the accountability and transparency is so important to me right now. When I go out, it has to be with people who know what I am doing and will be supportive in the fact that they know me making good decisions is expected and assumed.
4.) Sad, lonely, anxious, scared…the numbing effect of food- I have done this for so long that it is still very new to me to actually have to deal with the emotions I am feeling instead of dealing with a stomach ache after eating a dozen donuts thinking that gorging myself was the answer.
5.) Emptiness- I have separated this one out because for me it is the most powerful. Trying to fill the void with food was something I learned very very young. There is a song lyric that always sticks in my head when I think of this.”…I better learn how to starve the emptiness and feed the hunger” E.S
I have been listening to this song (watershed) since freshman year of college, I have tried for 20 years to figure out how to starve the emptiness… I feel closer now than I ever have before.
There are many reason I eat when I am not hungry. I can tell you that for 27 days now, I have not binged, I have not overeaten and I have not eaten for any of the 5 reasons I listed above. “when your learning to face the path at your pace every choice is worth your while”….-watershed-ES