Three tiered success.
This past weekend was all about cake. Okay, not really it was about birthdays, weddings and friends but the cake was a common thread and this is how it went down.
Tier 1- My friend Eric graciously invited me to join him and several others to celebrate his birthday Friday at Mitchell’s Fish Market. I made the decision that I did not want to miss out on a celebration for a dear friend but I had to make good choices, that was the compromise, thinking it through and making the best decisions I could, that is how moderation works and how I want to live my life. I looked at the menu ahead of time, I knew Lauren would be there if I needed her and I told Linds what I was thinking of ordering. No cocktails, no appetizers, no bread but I enjoyed an unsweet peach tea, a great salad with vinaigrette, two petite lobster tails with no butter, a salted baked potato (butter and sour cream on the side, of which I used only a small portion) steamed asparagus (not sauteed, like the menu said it was prepared) … I had it all planned out that while others ordered dessert I would have a cup of coffee with cream and a little sugar. You know what they say, they best laid plans….out comes the surprise (at least it was to me!) the cake that was baked by one of Eric’s best friends who is a chef, so you know it was gonna be good. I have to admit I panicked a bit, I was not prepared for it. I hear someone say it’s carrot cake, well that is something right? Carrots are good for you, right? I asked for a very small piece and the small piece was cut the size of Iowa…. oh, boy. I search for Lauren at the end of the table, I thought about texting Lindsey but in the end it’s me. I have to be able to do this… 4 bites, I enjoyed 4 bites of Eric’s birthday cake and it was delicious, then I set my fork down and I asked the person who was sitting next to me if I could put my plate under his. Done.
Tier 2- Weddings come with cakes, it’s a given. It was a beautiful outdoor ceremony on Saturday afternoon for my friend Stephanie and I was honored to witness such a special day. Because of my firm belief in the sanctity of cake, I knew I would be having a piece of wedding cake, it is my favorite dessert bar none. The opportunity does not present itself all that often so it was part of the plan for that day. Linds and I had a great workout in the morning and Lauren was sitting next to me and Scott across from me, that is a whole lot of support right there! It was a dark chocolate cake with peanut butter chocolate ganache in the middle and white icing. It was good, very good. There is something about wedding cake with that explosion of sugary fireworks in your mouth, the music of the electric slide echoing in your head and love in the air that makes the cake taste better. As good as it was, I was full after a few bites an left the remaining cake on my plate, pushing it aside and eventually sliding it under Lauren’s plate. Till death do us part….
Tier 3- What makes a nine year old boys birthday party complete? Yes, you guessed it, cake. On Sunday afternoon we celebrated Drew’s birthday with a homemade Cincinnati Bengals cake. It looked fabulous, the icing actually gave me the “come hither” look as I gave it the once over walking by the table it was displayed on as we waited to sing to sweet Drew. There is no way I was going to eat cake for the third day in a row, and I did not have to worry about eating this cake. One of my best friends already knew I was not having any, because I announced it to her days before. Just like she has so many times before in my life, she protected me from the possibility of my own self destruction in the form of my icing habit. Amy is always there, always loving me through the heartbreak of relationships that end, the death of my father, the times when I felt so alone, she is always there for me and making sure the cake and I had did not have a lazy Sunday rendezvous was no different. She is my family, the sister I never had but that I have found in her. She didn’t offer me cake, and I did ask for any. Does not get much simpler than that really.
This is a big deal for me, because being able to have a little bit of a food that in the past I was unable to have in any kind of moderation lets me know that I have changed, that I can be in control. While it may take planning and support from the people around me I can look at that luscious butter-cream devil on my shoulder and proudly say…I got this.